That was a co-worker’s assessment of his day so far – and it was only 8:30 am! For him, every day lately has been Awesome! because it brings him one day closer to his wedding day. His walk, his talk… everything about him says, I cannot wait to marry her! As I watched him float down the hallway back to his desk, I thought of my own wedding day… fourteen years ago.
My husband and I say it sometimes feels like fourteen days, other times like forty years, but either way, neither of us can remember the last time we told a story starting with “I” instead of “we.” And, we are okay with that! Fourteen years later and we still say “I love you” countless times a day. We pride ourselves on our ability to sicken those around us with our googly eyes and mutual admiration. We still kiss each other goodnight – every night.
Don’t get the impression, though, that my hubby and I have led a charmed life together. We haven’t. Money worries, kid rebellions, job stress… You name it, and we have most likely fretted and fought with it or wrestled and struggled over it. Major move? Did it. Go back to college? Did that too. (Twice.) Depression? Lived through it. (More than twice.) Hospitals? Know more than we care to. Death? Unfortunately, yes. We’ve both lost someone we deeply loved.
The past fourteen years haven’t been absent of heartache; but, they haven’t been absent of blessings either. Through both, there has never been any question in either of our minds about the depth and commitment of our love. Life has thrown us for a loop sometimes, but we have never – not once – lost an ounce of our love for each other because of ill circumstances. Likewise, we can’t say that we’ve loved each other more simply because life was treating us well. The measure of our love hasn’t fluctuated with our situation – good or bad.
Marriage made us one through love, and it has blessed us with a small glimpse of God’s larger plan for the world.
[F]or God is love… if we love one another, God lives in us, and his love is perfected in us (1 John 4:8-12 NRSV). God is present wherever steadfast love abides. I believe the love shared by two people who choose to marry is nothing short of the presence of God on Earth. Such love is not intended to live in isolation. God’s love is meant to be perfected in us as we steadfastly love those near to us and far from us, for we are all one in his love. This was Jesus’ request when he prayed to the Father in the hours leading up to his arrest:
“I ask not only on behalf of these, but also on behalf of those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one. As you, Father, are in me and I am in you, may they also be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me. The glory that you have given me I have given them, so that they may be one, as we are one, I in them and you in me, that they may become completely one, so that the world may know that you have sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me…. Righteous Father, the world does not know you, but I know you; and these know that you have sent me. I made your name known to them, and I will make it known, so that the love with which you have loved me may be in them, and I in them.” (John 17: 20-23, 25-26)
I view the marriage of two people who pledge to love each other through thick and thin as a celebration of the marriage that is to come between God and his church. When all the members of the church’s body are joined together with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit – that they may become completely one – there will be the voice of a great multitude, like the sound of many waters and like the sound of mighty thunderpeals, crying out, “Hallelujah! For the Lord our God the Almighty reigns. Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready…” (Rev 19:6-7)
“God, grant that the bonds of our common humanity, by which all your children are united one to another, and the living to the dead, may be so transformed by your grace, that your will may be done on earth as it is in heaven; where, O Father, with your Son, and the Holy Spirit, you live and reign in perfect unity, now and forever. Amen.” (Book of Common Prayer)